


Charms

by indigorose50



Series: Indigowallbreaker's Lazytown Prompts [81]
Category: LazyTown
Genre: Alternate Universe - Witchcraft, Butchering of the Icelandic Language, Curses, Familiars, First Kiss, Fluff, Friendship, Gen, Jealousy, Love Confessions, M/M, Magic, Original Character(s), Pre-Relationship, Sport is slow on the uptake, Tumblr Prompt, Witches
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-16
Updated: 2018-12-10
Packaged: 2019-01-18 06:42:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 6,204
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12382980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/indigorose50/pseuds/indigorose50
Summary: Sportacus finds out Robbie is a witch.[contains multiple witch!Robbie prompts]





	1. White Magic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Sportacus finds out that Robbie is a witch that uses white magic more than black magic?

 

“I figured it out,” Sportacus said. He was standing over Robbie, who lay on a bench in Lazytown, a plush purple pillow under his head.

Robbie opened his eyes and glared up at the hero, “Figured out what?”

“What you are.”

“A villain? A genius? An incredibly handsome person?”

“A witch,” declared Sportacus.

Robbie sat up, “That’s it?”

“Yes.”

“Sportablind,  _everyone_ knows I’m a witch.”

Sportacus blinked rapidly, more than a little shocked, “They do?”

“Of  _course_  they do! Why do you think I, a  _villain_ , haven’t just been banished from town yet? Everyone comes to me for charms and things.”

Embarrassment flushed Sportacus’ face. The rest of town knew? Sportacus had been in Lazytown for just over two years and he had only figured it out yesterday.

Robbie must have mistaken his silence for something else because he suddenly crossed his arms and huffed, “If you have a problem with me being a witch, I’d like to point out  _I_ was here  _first_.”

“It’s not a problem!” Sportacus sat beside Robbie on the bench, ignoring the way Robbie shifted back from him, “I just cannot believe I am the last to know. You really give out charms to everyone?”

“If they ask. Usually Milford wants a charm to induce confidence if he has a big meeting. Or Tricky wants a blessing so she can sleep well the night before a test.”

“Trixie. What about curses? Or hexes?”

Robbie scowled, “Don’t be ridiculous. Not every witch uses black magic like that. I try and stay away from that stuff as much as possible.”

A fresh wave of embarrassment coursed through Sportacus, “There’s... there’s different kinds of witch magic?”

Robbie stared at him for a few moments. Briefly, Sportacus wondered if witches could read minds. With a snort of laughter, Robbie jumped to his feet, a tight hold on Sportacus’ arm.

“You have a lot to learn, Sportastupid,” Robbie said, “To the Lair! It’s time for Witches 101!”

Before Sportacus could even think about objecting, Robbie was pulling him out of town at top speed.


	2. Potions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Witch!Robbie. One of the kids get hurt from a scheme gone wrong. Robbie leaves and comes back with a potion or a spell to heal the kid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Looks like this might turn into A Thing.

Sportacus held Stingy as the boy sobbed, trying to calm him down and glaring off in the direction Robbie had run. One minute, Robbie, dressed as a construction worker, was loudly telling the kids they couldn’t play on the playground because it was “unsafe” and “needed a year’s worth of repairs so go back inside and be quiet”. The next minute, Stingy had somehow got hit in the face with Robbie’s tool belt.

It had obviously been an accident but Stingy immediately started crying. Robbie didn’t even hesitate and ran off towards his lair. Sportacus was trying very hard not to be angry about that. Most people couldn’t stand crying children and Robbie wasn’t good with loud noises in the first place. But he couldn’t help feeling annoyed that Robbie would just leave without a word after hurting one of the kids, disguise or no disguise. 

“Is he gonna be okay?” Stephanie said softly over Stingy’s wails. The other kids hung back, watching their friend from afar.

“He might have a black eye but that is all,” Sportacus said. He stoked Stingy’s hair, “Stingy, you are okay, I promise.”

“I-it _hurts_ ,” Stingy insisted into Sportacus’ vest.

“I know but you need to calm down so we can go inside and put some ice on it. That will make you feel much better.”

A small puff of smoke caught Sportacus’ eye. He turned to see Robbie beside the bench, dusting himself off.

“Robbie  _Rotten_!” Stephanie, Pixel, Ziggy, and Trixie cried.

Robbie didn’t even look at them. He crouched beside Stingy and Sportacus. “Stingy, look at me.” Stingy did so. His face was red from crying and snot was dribbling from his nose. The skin around his right eye was already darkening.

Robbie held the boy’s chin, examining his face. He pulled a small vial out of his pocket and popped off the top. It smelled like lemon and lavender.

“Robbie...” Sportacus said with a warning in his voice. He had only recently come to know Robbie was a witch. Even after their long talk in Robbie’s lair a week ago, Sportacus was a little wary of potions and magic being used around the kids.

“Let me work, Sporty,” was Robbie’s answer. Robbie held the potion up to Stingy, “Drink this slowly.” Stingy did as he was told. Robbie pulled out a container with some kind of cream in it and dabbed a bit around Stingy’s eye.

“What are you doing?” Pixel asked from behind Robbie.

“That potion will calm him down,” Robbie explained, looking at Sportacus, “and this salve will heal his eye in a few minutes. Don’t let him touch it or eat it or anything.”

The potion seemed to be working already. Stingy, with a sniff, leaned over to hug Robbie around the neck, “Thank you, Robbie.”

Robbie stiffened and patted the kid awkwardly on the back, “I, uh, ran into that construction worker before I got here. He said he was really really sorry and that the playground is safe now.”

With a cheer, the five kids ran off to the playground. Sportacus stood up and beamed at Robbie. Robbie blushed and snapped his fingers, vanishing before Sportacus could say a word.  


	3. Curses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Sportacus asks Robbie why he doesn't use black magic. Robbie explains that he and Glanni tried to put a curse on someone but it backfired.

A month after finding out Robbie was a witch and getting the run down on witches and their magic, Sportacus finally gathered up the courage to ask Robbie something he had been wondering since their first conversation.

“What  _don’t_ you use black magic?”

Robbie frowned at him. The pair were walking back into town. Sportacus had offered to help carry Robbie’s groceries.

“You said you try and stay away from black magic as much as possible. Why?”

“You mean apart from what I told you about it being dangerous and time consuming and complicated?”

“Yes.”

Robbie sighed, “If you must know, my cousin and I tried using it once and it... backfired.”

“Backfired? What were you trying to do?” The minute the words were out of Sportacus’ mouth, he wondered if he was being too nosy. “Sorry, you don’t have to answer that.”

“No, it’s fine,” Robbie kept his eyes on his feet as they walked, “Long story short, there was a witch in our town that pissed us off. Glanni and I tried to curse her broom out of control while she was flying by but we did something wrong. Still not sure what.” He kicked a rock and watched it bounce into the street. “WE went flying up instead. She was so mad that we had tried to curse her, she just watched us. We were flung around like rag dolls until my mom came looking for us and took the curse off.”  

Sportacus watched Robbie. He hadn’t lifted his head as he told the story. His tone was casual but Sportacus could tell the memory still bothered him. 

“Were you two okay?” Sportacus asked after a few moments of silence.  

“Apart from our pride, yes.”

“Is that why you’re afraid of heights?”

Robbie snorted, “I’m afraid of heights because I’m a rational and sane person! Not an adrenaline junkie like  _you_.”

Sportacus laughed, “I’m not a _junkie_!”

“I watch you jump out of your ship  _regularly_. Gives me a heart attack.”

“Aw, you’re worried about me,” Sportacus teased. He grinned as he watched Robbie blush again. At least the witch wasn’t dwelling on the past anymore.

Robbie, still pink, glared at him, “I reveal something deeply personal to you and  _this_ is how you treat me?!”

“Do you want me to reveal something deeply personal in return?” 

“Go ahead. Surprise me.”

Sportacus thought about it for a second before leaning over and whispering in Robbie’s ear, “You’re cute when you blush.”

He picked up his pace, walking a little in front of Robbie. He couldn’t contain a smirk as Robbie stumbled behind him, spluttering. 


	4. Spells

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: A witch visits Lazy Town and gets along with Robbie over witchcraft. +jealous!Sporty

Stealth wasn’t Sportacus strong suit but here he was, following Robbie and his new friend around town. The two walked just ahead of Sportacus, too absorbed in their conversation to notice him. Jeremy had come to town not long ago and made it no secret that he was a witch. Robbie had come out to investigate the noise and the two had barely been apart since. They swapped stories, traded tricks, and showed off spells. Sportacus had never seen Robbie out of his lair so often. All because of Jeremy.

It was annoying.

The pair broke into laughter ahead of Sportacus and he winced. Robbie had taught Sportacus a lot about magic and witches but Jeremy, as a fellow witch, could relate to Robbie on a deeper level. Sportacus hated to be jealous; Jeremy made Robbie happy. And yet here Sportacus was, trailing behind as Jeremy clapped a hand on Robbie’s shoulder. The two rounded a corner between buildings and Sportacus followed, pressing his back up against the wall at the mouth of the alley and straining to listen.

“That’s brilliant, Robbie!” Jeremy was saying, “I’m not too good with facial spells myself. Makeup and the like. But they seem like your specially.” 

“Well I don’t like to brag but I  _am_ called the Master of Disguise.” Sportacus smiled at the confidence in Robbie’s voice. “Body magic is what I’m best at.”

“All I’ve got is a spell for chapped lips.”

“Sounds handy. What is it?”

Jeremy didn’t verbally reply to that so Sportacus took a chance and peeked around the corner. Jeremy was kissing Robbie. 

It took Sportacus a few moments to realize what he was seeing. Jeremy, who was within an inch of Robbie’s height, was kissing him firmly on the lips, eyes closed. Robbie’s were still opened and seemed fixed ahead of him in surprise. Sportacus’ heart dropped into his boots. What had he even meant to accomplish by following them? 

Before Sportacus could turn away, Robbie placed a hand on Jeremy’s chest and gently pushed the other witch back. “Jeremy,” he began. 

But Jeremy shook his head and stepped away, “I knew it,” he said with a smirk, “Figured it was worth a shot.”

“Knew what?” 

“You’ve already got your heart set on someone else.” Jeremy laughed as Robbie stammered helplessly, “Personally I think you should go for it.”

“It’s too  _embarrassing_ ,” Robbie was finally able to say, “He’s been my enemy for so long...”

“Hey, if it doesn’t turn out like you want, just slip him a forget-me-now potion.”

“I couldn’t do that to him!”

Jeremy smirked again, “Oh you’ve _definitely_ got it bad. You need to say something. In fact, why not do it now?”

Sportacus, who had been rooted to the spot as if hypnotized, watched as Jeremy held Robbie by the chin and turned his head in Sportacus’ direction. Robbie’s eyes went wide as they locked with Sportacus’. Jeremy let go and walked calmly down the alley, calling, “Have a nice chat, lads! I’ll be around!” 


	5. Herbs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: I'd love to maybe see something set before Sportacus finds out/before Robbie confirmed it for him where one of the kids says something offhand about Robbie being a witch and Sport gets upset and confused about why this sweet child is insulting Robbie like this?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a prequel of sorts. Therefore, it happened well before last chapter.

It was a bright summer day and all the kids were excited to play soccer on the sports field. Everyone except Stephanie, that is.

“Why don’t you wanna play with us?” Ziggy asked when Stephanie announced she was going home instead.

“I don’t feel good today,” she admitted, “My head really hurts.”

“Are you sick?” Stingy asked, taking a few steps away from her.

“My uncle checked. I don’t have a fever.”

Trixie hummed in thought and looked at the others. They all nodded. Stephanie had only been in town a short time. Not long enough to  _know_ , but long enough that she  _should_ know.

“Let’s go see Robbie,” Trixie announced, “He can make your headache go away.” 

“Robbie  _Rotten_? How can _he_ help?”

“He helps us with a lot of things like that,” Pixel explained, “He’s got a way to fix headaches, stomach aches; he even gives Ms. Busybody stuff for her pimples sometimes.”

Stephanie was confused but she trusted her new friends and let them lead her to Robbie’s lair.

Half an hour later, the five made their way back into town. Stephanie felt better than ever. After lecturing them about the importance of leaving him alone, Robbie gave her a small purple pill that tasted like lavender and honey. 

“I never would have guessed Robbie was a  _witch_!” Stephanie said in wonder.

“ _Stephanie_!” 

Everyone looked around to find Sportacus not far away. He looked shocked, “Don’t say things like that about other people! You could hurt their feelings.”

Stephanie frowned, “But Robbie _is_ a—”

Just then, the crystal in Sportacus’ chest rang out.

“Someone’s in trouble!” Sportacus said. He looked down at the kids. “Remember what I said. Be kind to others. Don’t call Robbie names!” And with that, he ran off.

The kids watched him go in silence. “Should we tell him?” Pixel asked the group at large.

Trixie grinned, “Let him figure it out on his own.”


	6. Familiar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Lazytown's resident kitten attempts to change Robbie's mind about familiars.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all here on ao3 wouldn't have seen this but I posted about my headcanons for this AU. This prompt comes from that post [which you cna read here.](http://indigowallbreaker.tumblr.com/post/167143296172/headcanons-for-witchrobbie-au-its-my-fav)

The kitten stared at Robbie. Robbie kept his eyes on his bowl of ice cream, determinedly not staring back. They were in the park. The kitten had been following him around all week. Robbie had woken up more than once to it curled up in his lap. It followed him into stores, during schemes, and even tried to sneak into his lair one time. 

All it did was stare at him with big grey eyes. He knew what it wanted. But he wasn’t happy about it.

“Go away,” he growled without looking up. It meowed. “I told you I don’t need one and I don’t  _want_ one.”

Finally he glared over at it. It had cocked its head to one side, tail flicking behind it. “You’re too young anyway,” Robbie went on, “You need to wait for your magic to—”

“Robbie?” Trixie’s voice made Robbie jump. She leaned over the back of his bench, smirking at him. “Are you talking to a cat?”

Robbie huffed, “Leave me alone,  _brat_.”

“ _Can_ you talk to cats?!”

“… No.”

The kitten meowed again. Trixie giggled, “Can you understand them?”

“No, I can’t. Not without certain potions.”

“So why are you talking to it?” Trixie came around to sit beside him. Robbie shifted his glare to her. Could he never get peace around here?

“It wants to be my familiar,” he explained. “But I—”

“That sounds  _awesome_!” Trixie interrupted. “Then you’d be, like, a  _real_  witch! That would be so cool!”

Robbie pointed at her with his ice cream spoon. “I  _am_  a real witch, you brat! And I don’t need a familiar!”

Trixie got up from the bench to sit beside the kitten. The kitten didn’t take its eyes off Robbie. Though it did let itself be pet. “What’s wrong with having a familiar?”

The full explanation was not something he wanted to get into with anyone, much less one of the kids, but maybe if the kitten heard his reasons it would leave him alone. He sat back against the bench, staring into the sky. “When I was little, my father had a familiar. You bond magically with them, as well as emotionally. His familiar was killed in an accident. My father was a wreck for  _years_. I don’t want to go through any of that. I’m fine on my own.”

He sat up and scowled down at the pair on the ground. “Besides, this kitten is barely a year old. It needs to let its magic mature before it can even _think_ about bonding.”

The kitten meowed again. Trixie nodded, “You’re right, kitty, he just thinks he’s too good for you.” She made aa show of shaking her head in disappointment.

Robbie pointed the spoon at her again. “I know for a  _fact_ that you have no idea what it just s—”

The spoon fell from his fingers. Before Robbie could process that he had even just dropped it, the spoon turned green and froze in midair. Both Robbie and Trixie looked at the kitten. Its eyes were bright green, gaze fixed on the spoon. Robbie gently grabbed the spoon and pulled it away with a hint of his own magic. It pulsed purple before coming away in Robbie’s hand.

Trixie was smirking. “Still think its magic needs to mature?”

With another glare, Robbie stuffed ice cream in his mouth and ignored them both.


	7. The Truth Come Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: How about something with Sportacus like; Robbie has done some weird things that a human couldn't be able to do then something just clicks and he Finally™️ goes "wait is he a witch?.... HE'S A WITCH!!" :O

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Set (right) before the first chapter.

Sportacus was fully aware that Robbie wasn’t human. He just couldn’t figure out  _what_ Robbie was. Too tall to be an elf. Too short for a troll. It kept Sportacus up some nights, the clock blinking 10:08 as if lecturing him on sleep habits. But Robbie had to be  _something_ magical. The inventions, disguises; Robbie wouldn’t be able to do half of them without some kind of magical help. 

A big clue came when Sportacus spotted Robbie crawling around a tree on a rainy day.

“Robbie? Did you lose something?” He asked, crouching beside him.

Robbie’s knees were muddy and rain dripped from his hair. He jumped when Sportacus spoke. “Stop doing that!” He cried.

“Sorry. Did you lose something?” 

“No,” Robbie said, looking back at the ground. “I’m  _looking_ for something. An herb called athelas. It usually grows around this tree.”

“Would you like some help?” Sportacus offered hopefully. The more time he spent with Robbie outside schemes, the more he could learn about the not-human.

Robbie sniffed. “Fine.” He described the herb and the two spend a good while scouring the grass around the tree. Just when the rain was starting to get to him, Sportacus’ hand closed on a promising plant.

Grinning, he held it up to Robbie, “Is this—”

“Yes!” Robbie ripped it from his frozen fingers. “At last!” With that, he stood and ran away, leaving Sportacus to stare after him, covered in mud.

There were of course a dozen or so little clues. Like the time Ziggy asked Robbie if he wanted a part in the play they were putting on and Robbie had said casually “Not today. Have you  _seen_ where Mercury is? I’d get my lines mixed up.” Ziggy had stared up at the sky, both worried and confused.

And then there was day Stingy and Trixie were having a tea party by the slide and Robbie had joined them. Sportacus had been too far away to hear what was being said but he saw the kids standing up and peering into the cup Robbie was holding, eyes wide with fascination as Robbie spoke. 

The last big clue came after a scheme involving a goat, a fake hotel, and a bath tub. Sportacus revealed Robbie’s disguise and the villain slunk away, defeated. Sportacus found him later, still wearing parts of his disguise, pacing and muttering to himself.

“Robbie? Are you okay?” Had Sportacus been too rough on him earlier?

But Robbie didn’t appear to hear him. He paced back and forth behind town hall. “ _La Miayvai Nesal_? No, maybe it was  _Salla Miayvaine_? That can’t be right...”

The words were not in any language Sportacus was familiar with. He stepped closer. “Is everything alright, Robbie?”

Robbie spun, saw Sportacus, and flung out his hand. “ _Yvai Nelami As Al_!” He cried. On reflex, Sportacus put up his hand defensively and squeezed his eyes shut.

But nothing happened.

“Are you  _kidding_ me?!” 

Sportacus opened his eyes. Robbie was glaring down at his hand. “What was—”

“That’s the spell that should have stopped you earlier!” Robbie stomped his foot. “But I can’t get it  _right_!” Again he stomped away before Sportacus could speak.

Later, alone in his airship, Sportacus pieced everything together. Tea cups, disguises, weird herbs, planets, strange inventions, spells, living alone just outside of town—

“Oh,” Sportacus said quietly to the empty ship. “Ohhh...”


	8. Haunted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: For the witch!Robbie AU, one or more of the characters celebrating Halloween. (I'd love a kitten cameo).

It was Kit who found them. All five children were huddled by the front door of the ‘Haunted’ house, scared out of their wits. The kitten came seemingly out of nowhere. It sat and stared at them; watching Pixel smacking the flash to make it turn on, Ziggy with his face buried in Stephanie’s shoulder, Stephanie trying not to cry in fright, Stingy tugging at the door handle, and Trixie, the only one still stand, armed with a baseball bat and shaking. Her eyes darted around, keeping watch for ghost or demons or whatever had been chasing them.

When Trixie saw Kit she squeaked out. “G-Get Robbie. Please. W-We need h-h-help.”

The others looked around and saw Kit too. Before anyone else could make a request, the cat turned and walked into the darkness.

A few moments later, thought it felt like years to the children, the front door swung open. Stingy fell forward, landing at the feet of an angry looking Robbie.

“What do you think you’re  _doing_?!” He yelled. Kit was perched on his shoulder, licking a paw. “Why are you walking around a haunted building on  _Mischief Night_?!”

Ziggy didn’t answer. He let go of Stephanie and ran to Robbie, hugging him around the middle and sobbing in relief. Robbie’s glare didn’t fade but he did rest a hand comfortingly on Ziggy’s head.

Stephanie, Trixie, and Pixel all ran out of the house too. As soon as Stephanie shut the door, Pixel’s flashlight finally went on, illuminating everyone. “We-We didn’t think it was _really_ haunted!” Stephanie explained.

“We just wanted to get in the mood for Halloween,” Trixie added. “Then a ghost started chasing us!”

Pixel was still looking over his flashlight. “Something was chasing us but it couldn’t have been a _ghost_. Ghosts aren’t real.” He looked up at Robbie. “Right?”

“Ghosts no. Spirits yes.”

Pixel dropped the flashlight.

“Normally this house is perfectly empty,” Robbie went on, gesturing to the building with his free hand. “But around Halloween, our world and the spirit world are so close together that it becomes... occupied.”

Stingy shuffled around until Robbie was between him and the Actually Haunted house. “So something  _was_  chasing us?!”  

“Probably.”

Before anyone could properly panic about this, Sportacus ran up the hill, sliding to a stop in the circle of light. “My crystal just went off! Who is in trouble?!”

Robbie waved a hand. “They’re all about to pee their pants so possibly everyone.”

Sportacus knelt to try and calm Ziggy down. Stephanie scratched her head. “Robbie, why didn’t Sportacus’ crystal go off earlier? Were we not in danger from the spirits?”

Kit meowed. Robbie exchanged a look with familiar before shrugging at Stephanie. “Could be that the spirit hid you from Sportacus. Not sure.” 

As Sportacus spoke softly with Ziggy and Robbie walked back down the hill with Kit, the others slowly turned to the house, thinking Halloween couldn’t be over soon enough.  


	9. Hex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: witch!Robbie?? some religious dumbdumb doesn't believe Robbie should be in Lazytown, so Rob hands them a fake hex bag to scare them. Sportie disapproves of both of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was actually posted a few days ago but I forgot to put it here too XP Sorry! Prompts are still open until the 30th!

“It cannot be safe to have someone like  _that_ around children!” The priest said. He didn’t quiet yell, but it did have both hands on Milford’s desk, leaning forward and scowling intensely. So Milford felt he was getting yelled at. Which as a person, he did not like and, as the Mayor of Lazytown, he did not think was fair. Milford opened his mouth to try and explain, but the priest was having none of it. “Witches and anyone who practices dark magic can  _never_ be safe. He poisons their souls just by being here!”

“Actually he doesn’t _ever_ use dark magic. Robbie has explained the different kinds of magic to me multiple—”

“How can you trust him?!” The priest interrupted. “How can you know he is not lying to your face?!”

Through the years, many strange visitors had come to Lazytown. This man was quickly becoming Milford’s least favorite. Milford stood from his desk and straightened his coat. “Sir, I can assure you: Robbie Rotten may be our villain, a master of disguise, the one who constantly tries to trick the children into being lazy, and has more than once knocked out our hero. But he would  _never_ harm us with magic!”

The words hung in the air for exactly one breath before Milford realized how _horrible_ that had all sounded. “He— he doesn’t do a lot of that anymore!” He said quickly. The priest narrowed his eyes. “He and Sportacus are good friends now! And he even helps with the kids a lot! And, uh, and—”

Luckily, Milford was saved by Sportacus opening the door to Town Hall. “Hello!” Sportacus greeted them. “I am Sportacus!”

“Hello,” the priest returned flatly. He glared at Milford. “You’re lucky another of my congregation was not with me. He has a less lenient view on  _elves_ than I do.” 

Sportacus jovial face fell. In fact, he looked more serious than Milford had ever seen him. He shut the door and crossed the room to stand before the priest. “I was stopping by to vouch for Robbie but maybe that will not be enough for you.”

Milford could only stare and shuffle backward a bit. The priest and Sportacus were giving each other equally unimpressed looks, neither breaking eye contact. The priest leaned forward, inches from Sportacus’ face. “If even you, the so called _hero_ , is swayed by dark magic, God Himself might not be enough to save this town.”

Sportacus stepped back and shook his head. “Well, I tried, Sportadork. My way now.”

Confusion wrapped Milford’s brain like a vice at that statement. Why, that didn’t sound like Sportacus as at all! It sounded like—

Sportacus snapped his fingers and smoke billowed around him. Robbie Rotten stood in his place, looking at the priest like he was a bit of trash to be swept up. “Here— a gift for you.” Robbie pulled a small purple bag out of his pocket and jammed it into the priest’s hands. The priest tried to drop it immediately, but found the bag stuck to his palms. “If you don’t leave town within the next hour, well...” Robbie stepped forward and tapped the bag. “ _Megi tröll hafa þína vini_.”

The priest made the sign of the cross, then bolted from the building. A moment later, Sportacus peaked inside. “I still think that was a mean idea.”

Robbie shrugged. “It worked, right?”

“I guess...”

“W-what will happen if he doesn’t leave town?” Milford asked, shaking head to toe.

“Not a thing, though if he ever finds out what I said he may realize my trick.” He coughed awkwardly. “Thank you, by the way, Mayor. For sticking up for me. Or, trying to, at least.”

Milford was slightly taken aback but grinned all the same. “Of course, Robbie! Don’t ever doubt your place in this town!”

Face tinged pink, Robbie marched out of town hall. Sportacus chuckled and hurried after him. Milford sat heavily in his chair, thinking about all the strange visitors _and_ residents of his town.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *"Megi tröll hafa þína vini" roughly translates to ‘May the trolls take your friends’ which means the same as ‘Fuck you too’.


	10. Brunch

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Bessie and the ladies are having brunch and had invited Robbie and he just quietly eats as he listens to ladies spill tea about their exes and they ask him if he has any tea about some exes, he tells them about his ex bf and their almost wedding + sportacus being nearby and heard most of it and goes " :o "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We've been talking Witch!Robbie HCs on tumblr. The idea for this prompt came from [this post](http://indigowallbreaker.tumblr.com/post/179361985607/witch-au-hc-robbie-has-these-weird-stories-but-he)  
> .

Robbie is starting to think the ‘just plain orange juice dear’ is spiked with something and resolves to get invited to brunch more often. Around him are Bessie’s friends: Maggie Tickstoff, who owns a flower shop, Tilly Mills, a baker, and Lauren Stevens, who writes for the “Mayhem Town Weekly” advice column. Bessie had laid out an impressive array of food for them all, but it is largely ignored in favor of storytelling. The current topic is messy exes. 

“… and then Alice just stormed out! Didn’t even take her change,” Tilly is saying. “Everyone was staring at me and I couldn’t think of anything to do but cry I was so humiliated.” She sips her tea and shrugs. “But that’s how I met Aamir so it all worked out for the best anyway. He offered me a napkin and said he liked my earrings.” 

“That’s so sweet!” Bessie says, applying more jam to her scone. 

Lauren scoffs, “ _I_  know Alice. She’s on her third husband, right?”

Tilly gives it some thought. “I believe so. I don’t think anyone counts the time she got married in Vegas.” 

“My wife Jan used to date her too. Said she would always tip below 15% to encourage ‘improvement’.”

Even Robbie shakes his head at that one. No one should be  _that_  evil.

Perhaps attracted to his movement, Maggie turns to him. “What about you, dear? Any relationships to speak of? A handsome man like you, you must leave them in your wake!”

Bessie giggles as a blush heats Robbie’s face. All the ladies are looking at him now. He charms the plate of pancakes to fly to him before settling back in his chair. “I do have one.” They all sit up a little straighter, watching him. Even Bessie, though she wormed the story out of him years ago. 

Robbie doesn’t look at them. He slowly butters his pancakes and speaks. “When I was 16 I met a werewolf in the woods.”

Right away, he finds out a lot about Bessie’s friends. Tilly nods like you find werewolves every day. Lauren scoots back in her chair, wide-eyed. Maggie crosses herself but doesn’t say anything.

“It was the morning after a full moon. I gave him my shirt to cover himself with. We started a routine. Every new moon he gave me rare plants from deep inside the forest, and every full moon I helped him clean himself up.”

“What was he like?” Lauren asks.

“You’ve all met Sportacus?” They nod. “Like that, but taller. And with longer hair.” He bites a bit of pancake. “And shirtless most of the time.” Tilly fans herself. “Anyway, this goes on for about 6 months, he proposes— then the night before our wedding, he leaves me a note saying he’d just been using me to make his ex-boyfriend jealous and now they were eloping.” Robbie stuffs the whole pancake into his mouth and avoids their eyes. He expects a stern talking to about how stupid it is for a 16 year old to marry after half a year.

Instead, there is indignant yelling.

“How  _dare_ he! To use  _marriage_ just to make someone jealous—”

“The piece of scum! You tell me where he lives, Jan’s father used to be part of a gang, he can get you justice—”

“You poor dear! Tricked at 16!”

Bessie’s voice travels above the rest. “Hello, Sportacus! Glad you could make it!”

Robbie whips around. Sportacus has just fallen through the open window and is smiling sheepishly up at them. Robbie swallows his pancake. “What…?”

“Bessie invited me,” Sportacus explains from the floor. “But I heard you telling a story so I waited to knock and kind of... listened.”

All four ladies rip into Sportacus about eavesdropping on Lady’s Brunch. Robbie waves a hand and reheats everyone’s tea to show his thanks.


	11. Spells II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Sequel to that Jeremy cliffhanger. The boys finally have their Talk™️

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FINALLY.
> 
> As you might guess, this takes place right after chapter 4! Happy 1 year to this AU ^_^

Jeremy disappeared around the corner at the same moment that Robbie broke eye contract. He marched towards Sportacus, who held his breath, then went right past him.  “Robbie—”

“ _Please_ don’t talk, Sportasneak, this is already embarrassing enough,” Robbie said without turning around.

Sportacus walked after him. “Embarrassing?”

“Getting caught kissing a guy then admitting you like a _different_ guy and _then_ getting told by the _first_ guy, who hasn’t been in town a _week_ , that it was obvious who you liked in the first place?!” Robbie scrunched up his shoulders as Sportacus drew level with him. “It’s a _little embarrassing_.”

If Sportacus hadn’t been involved in the scene Robbie had just described, he would be very confused. “I’m sorry I eavesdropped on you. I should have let you tell me in your own time.” He coughed awkwardly. “Or, um, told you myself.”

Robbie slowed down and stared at Sportacus. “Told me what?”

Sportacus felt heat crawl up his face. “Um, that I feel the same way?”

There was a pause where Sportacus considered making beeping noises and running off to help “someone in trouble”. It was likely true and his crystal was just keeping quiet to let him suffer this uncomfortable situation. He had rarely envisioned telling Robbie his feelings but just outside an alley directly after watching another man kiss Robbie was not his ideal circumstance.

“ _WHY_?!”

Sportacus jumped at the sudden outcry. “Why what?”

“Why do you like _me_?!” Robbie stepped in front of Sportacus to block his way and spread his arms. “What about a lanky, underground, greasy witch could appeal to _you_?!”

“W-Well what about me?” Sportacus countered, patting his chest. “I’m a hero who got too attached to his first town, can only really talk about exercise, and am so dense I did not know you were a witch for over a year!”

Robbie looked shocked. “What are you talking about?!” He cupped Sportacus’ face. “You’re super handsome and strong and knit cute things and let me teach you about magic and you’re nice to me even when I try to kick you out of town!”

Flustered, Sportacus could only repeat Robbie’s actions. “Yeah, well, you are kind to the children!” He said through squished cheeks. “And you use your magic to help everyone and sometimes when you laugh your snort and it’s really cute!”

They stared at each other, the echoes of their shouting match fading. Then— Sportacus didn’t know who started it— they were laughing. “We- we probably sound like idiots,” Robbie giggled.

“Probably because we _are_.” Sportacus leaned forward to press their foreheads together. He figured at this distance, Robbie wouldn’t see him blushing like an apple. “Can I kiss you?”

“Absolutely.”

“Good. I kind of want to get the taste of Jeremy off your lips.”

He _heard_ Robbie swallow. “Are you always this possessive?”

Sportacus tilted his head up and whispered against Robbie’s lips. “No idea.” Then his lips were on Robbie’s.

He heard a chuckle nearby that sounded a lot like a currently visiting witch. In defiance, Sportacus wrapped his arms around Robbie’s neck to deepen their contact. Robbie let out a squeak and Sportacus pulled away. “Sorry, was that—”

But Robbie leaned forward and restarted the kiss, shaking hands holding Sportacus’ waist, and Jeremy was driven from both their minds.


	12. Brunch II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Could I get an oh-hey-fancy-to-meet-you-here thing for that werewolf ex in the Witch AU? Like the werewolf comes in, and the whole town is ready to fight this dude bc they all love Robbie so much?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry prompts are so few and far between lately. Been working on a [big project](http://indigowallbreaker.tumblr.com/post/180366229832/anyway-im-working-on-a-secret-project-printed-itLINK) ;)

Robbie could tell something was wrong without even opening his eyes. He was lounging by the baseball field, trying to nap, when he realized the kids weren’t running around anymore. No one was playing catch or swinging the bats around.

Footsteps crunched over the dirt towards him and Robbie still kept his eyes shut. Let them think they were catching him unaware. He was sure he could cook up a spell faster than they could even—

“Hey.”

That voice made his heart jump in his chest, and not in the same way as when Sportacus smiled at him for eating a carrot. This voice shot through Robbie and left panic in its wake. Hoping he looked indifferent, Robbie cracked open one eye. “And what,” he drawled, “are _you_ doing here?”

Tyler grinned down at him. He looked nearly the same as he had the night before he left Robbie. Dirty blond hair down to his shoulders, day-old scruff around his chin, blue eyes. If he were a touch paler and cut his hair he would look like a human Sportacus. 

“Nice to see you too, sweetheart,” Tyler said. He had a brown rucksack over one shoulder. Behind him, Robbie could see the kids whispering to each other and staring. Behind  _them_ , Milford, Bessie, and Bessie’s friends also stared and whispered. Annoying as it was to have an audience for this unwanted reunion, Robbie wished Sportacus was here too. 

Robbie stood up and stretched casually. “Don’t call me that. And I won’t ask again.”

“What, I can’t stop in on old friends?”

“Not this one.”

Tyler shrugged. “Truth be told, Marco kicked me out and I was passing through. Smelled you. Made me miss you.”

Robbie’s eyes darted away. No way had Tyler missed him. Not after 20 years of quiet. He spotted Sportacus flip over towards Bessie and start talking with her friends. Steeling himself, Robbie said, “Keep missing me. Go away.”

“Aw, you didn’t miss  _me_ , sweetheart?”

“I said to stop calling me that.”

“Then what should I call you?” Tyler asked, stepping forward and cupping Robbie’s chin. “ _Mine_?” He rubbed his thumb over Robbie’s lips. Robbie had been wrong; no spells were coming to mind, no tricks or charms to put space between him and the embodiment of his biggest mistake, nothing to do but watch as Tyler stepped even closer.

With an extra loud “Hey, Robbie!”, Sportacus landed beside them. The noise startled Tyler backward and shook Robbie from his panicked stupor. Sportacus’ smile aimed at Tyler looked strangely... threatening. “Welcome to Lazytown,” Sportacus said in a low voice. “Robbie? Remember that thing you talked to Bessie’s friends about at brunch?”

“Uh.” Robbie ran a hand over his chin as if to wipe away Tyler’s touch. “Yeah?”

“Do you want their help to  _get rid_  of the problem?” 

Tyler narrowed his eyes. “What problem?”

“ _Yes_ ,” Robbie said desperately when it dawned on him what Sportacus meant. Wasting no time, Sportacus lets out a sharp whistle. 

Not just Bessie’s friends charged. The whole town ran over and placed themselves between Tyler and Robbie. Sportacus grabbed Robbie’s hand and pulled him even further back. Robbie felt himself shaking, heard Sportacus telling him to breathe, and tasted salt on his tongue as tears slowly fell down his face.

But all he could see was an outraged Tyler being pushed and lectured out of town by four pissed off women, a gang of children, and the Mayor himself. And Robbie felt more loved than he ever did with that scummy werewolf. 


End file.
